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  • pendul7
    Participant
    Post count: 280

    Hey everyone!

    I finally decided to start a blog. I want to commit myself to becoming better at poker and keep track of the journey. I hope it’ll be epic!

    Who am I? 31, from Switzerland. I’m about to finish my PhD in Economics (I defended it last November, only a few corrections left). Beside that, I had until recently a business with a friend, which I decided to quit because we weren’t able to work together anymore. Anyway, the good news is that I finally have more time for me now. Today I have a 9 to 5 job I like, but I’m not thrilled waking up every morning.

    Why poker? I have a real passion for poker, for the competition, but not just this. I think it’s a beautiful game, in many respects very similar to life. And I want to devote more time to it. My problem : I’ve played poker for fun for about 10 years, I was dealt more than a million hands, yet I’m still really bad at it. I also have massive tilt issues. So I want to work seriously on them and on my game.

    My tilt issue is the reason I called this blog “What’s done is done”; mainly to remind me that the last hand is over and I won’t be able to change it. But that’s up to me to learn from it, move on and play the next one as best as I can. I’d prefer to spend more money on buy-ins and less on new mouses or smartphones.

    My goals? Become the best poker player I can be, and get rid of my tilt issues (in and out of poker).

    Assuming the best poker player I can be is good enough to sustain myself, then why not play part or even fulltime. But I know it’s going to be a very long (yet exciting) journey. I have an incredible chance to live in Switzerland where I earn enough to play poker without caring too much about money. The drawback is that if I want to make it on the long run, fulltime without moving somewhere else, I must be able to hit 6 figures per year.

    How to achieve my goals? In the short term, I set some objectives.

    Poker objectives :

    • Study, a lot more:
      • Mark hands and review all of them,
      • Post at least two hands per week on forum/discord,
      • Identify big leaks and work on them,
      • min. 2h of video/week,
    • Be more active in general on discord/forum. This is a very difficult one for me. I truly think I’m bad. Thus, how can I possibly bring any added value to the community? I didn’t figure this out yet, but we’ll see!
    • Play less tables but increase ingame awareness (max 4),

    Other objectives :

    • Meditate, at least 10-15 minutes every day,
    • Spend less time on social media. I installed a tracker blocking apps if I spend too much time on it,
    • Watch less Netflix and dumb shit on TV (it’s good to have more time, but I need to spend it wisely),
    • Read more. Currently reading “The Power of Now” by Eckhart Tolle (inspired by Bencb).

    This might be very small steps for some of you. I know, but I want to create good habits. I want it to be sustainable. I want to reach my goals, and then I’ll set others higher.

    I’ve already started to meditate, it’s been about 4 weeks now, and I must tell I already feel a difference. It’s only the first step of many, I know it’s still going to be very hard, but at least I feel I’m going in the right direction.

    Feel free to comment if you want to, I’d be more than happy to read your feedbacks. I’m feeling pumped to start this journey and I can’t wait to let you know how it goes!

    rye_mariano5
    Moderator
    Post count: 1935

    Hey, what’s up man!? Welcome to the RYE community! Glad you’ve found us.

    I like your objectives a lot already. It’s all about getting good habits. And don’t worry, nobody is perfect. It’s just a process and every little change for the positive is a great thing.

    Also regarding the discord app, don’t worry at feeling like you’re a bad player. It doesn’t matter at all. Everyone has to start somewhere and we’re all here to learn. There are no stupid questions. So just get active. Post hands and comment on hands. As long as you put down your thoughts, you will start to learn at a much higher pace. You’ll get valueable feedback and will also have the benefit of getting your thoughts down in writing so you can start to get a process going for analyzing hands. Nobody will make fun of you or anything like that.

    good luck with the journey!

    pendul7
    Participant
    Post count: 280

    Hey Mariano, thanks for your post! I’m doing great, I hope you are too.

    As you say, I want to create a good environment and good habits so that I don’t have to “force it” anymore. It’s not a sprint, it’s a marathon!

    As for the community, I’m not really afraid to be laughed at or anything like that. I know it’s a very helpful and nice community, it’s just that I don’t want to only take advices from others by posting hands, I also would like to help others improve. But I guess everyone has to start somewhere and I’ll surely have insights to bring here and there :)

    aka_nosebud
    Participant
    Post count: 30

    Hey pendul7,

    I also started a blog recently, if you want you can pm me on discord and we could talk some poker together.(aka_nosebud @disocord aswell)

    I know how difficult it is to tilt sometimes, so i think it´s good you work at it. The “what´s done is done” attitude is exactly what helped me recently to get rid of tilt. What also worked for me is to focus on the side that even though you might lost a big hand and got sucked out you made a decision based on your knowledge of poker.

    You did your math, put your work and your hours in so for you your decision was right.

     

    Keep it up

     

    pendul7
    Participant
    Post count: 280

    Thanks for the feedback Steven!

    You’re totally right, although it’s so hard to have logical thoughts when you’re on tilt. At least for me, accepting and being more aware of myself and the anger/sadness/injustice/etc (and not fighting them) is the key. I can’t win with logical arguments against my emotions, I’ve tried for so many years with no result.

    Good idea, I’ll contact you right away :)

    pendul7
    Participant
    Post count: 280

    Small update

    Poker objectives :

    Pretty happy with what I’ve done so far this week. I still can’t dedicate as much time as I’d like to poker (study+play) due to my PhD, but still, I managed to have two study sessions and a grinding session.

    Small failure, I had 5 and even 6 tables open at the same time and my objective was max 4. Not so terrible, but I really need to work on my table awareness as I tend to get bored easily even though there’s always something to learn watching the tables. But I don’t pay attention well enough. Poker is a game of information, it’s stupid to let go so many infos. I have to do better, I know I can.

    Other objectives :

    Great mindset at the moment, I’m very happy with that. A long journey ahead, but I made the first steps in the right direction.

    Reading every morning during breakfast feels so good, it really feeds the mind. So much more than my Instagram “feed”. Haha!

    Meditation definitely seems to be THE key to my tilt issues. I feel more conscious to what I’m doing, more in the moment, and it’s less difficult to move on after big suckouts. But I know it’ll be years before I can completely free myself from it. But still, any improvement is encouraging. I had one big moment on Thursday, on the stone bubble in one of my biggest buyin of the day. The interesting part is that a month ago I’d probably have to buy a new mouse after loosing that hand. This time, yes I felt so angry, sad and frustrated to be 15/15 with a few big blinds left and 14 players paid. But I was able to overcome that, play well and hope for the double up. I ended up 6th. Things might have been different if I had busted 15th but still, I’m confident it’s going in the right direction.

    Alright, now time for more study and then a grinding session tonight! Cheers everyone!

    pendul7
    Participant
    Post count: 280

    The Sunday grind

    In terms of poker, not a grind to remember. A rough session, many mistakes and at the end, difficult to keep a good mindset. Still, a few good things to take away :

    I was able to control myself. Not as I’d like to, but slightly better every day. My mind still goes a bit crazy, especially when I make big mistakes, but a lot less than a month ago and I didn’t have any sort of “rush of anger” that are almost physically painful, urging me to smash something.

    At one time, I told myself : alright, it seems you won’t make any profit today. So instead, let’s get something else, some experience with positive mindset in times of rough sessions. Sort of a “sometimes you win, sometimes you learn” thinking. Afterwards, the card weren’t better but it felt a lot lighter. It might sound stupid, but worked well.

    I’m very happy because my mindset is improving a lot. I knew for a long time that you can’t win every session and that variance is huge. But I finally start to understand what it really means, focusing more on the big picture and the journey itself.

    Looks like I’m growing, I might even become a real man sometimes in the future.

    Cheers everyone, and good luck at the tables !

    rye_mariano5
    Moderator
    Post count: 1935

    Nice work on the mental side of things man!

    I’d suggest putting a lot of emphasis on BRM. Keep things conservative and it will allow you push through tough stretches and consistently grind without too much stress. For long term success it is just so essential. So many players come and go due to terrible BRM when they realistically could have been successful long term.

    good luck!

    pendul7
    Participant
    Post count: 280

    Hey Mariano, thanks a lot for your feedback. I’m happy with how it feels and I hope it’s only the very beginning.

    As for the BRM, it’s an interesting comment, I’ve actually been thinking a lot about it, although I wrote nothing on it. So here’s my current situation:

    For now, I play from $1.10 up to $11 MTT, which should give me a ABI of around $4-5 I guess (it’s a complete guess). My current BR is slightly above $1400 so I guess 250-300 MTTs is not so conservative but still OK, right? And in case I hit $1000, I’ll drop the $11, maybe even everything above $5.50.

    Having said that, I must say that right now, my main focus is on learning the game. Of course I’d love to build up a BR, but I know that for now the money is not the most important part of my current journey. Also because I could lose it all and reload without problem.

    Basically, at the beginning, I had two choices :

    1) start with a small BR and grind from the very bottom (that’s what I did, starting at ~$400),

    2) The alternative would have been to load with a much bigger BR and play higher right away but I don’t think it’s a good idea because I’d certainly get crush and I had to deal with my tilt issues. Better deal with that when money’s not so important yet.

    If you have any feedback/comment on this I’d be really happy to read from you!

    Cheers, and good luck at the tables !

    rye_mariano5
    Moderator
    Post count: 1935

    I really like the fact that you’re not focusing on the money. That’s a really great mindset to have as a player.

    And it looks like the BRM you’re using now is good. Especially if you can reload. No problem with what you’re doing at all. I think the $1-$11 range is a great place to put in lots of volume and develop your skills. There’s no reason to try to jump into higher stakes games right away IMO. You will learn what you need to at the lower levels with less stress and more consistent grind.

    keep up the good work!

    pendul7
    Participant
    Post count: 280

    I really like the fact that you’re not focusing on the money. That’s a really great mindset to have as a player.

    And it looks like the BRM you’re using now is good. Especially if you can reload. No problem with what you’re doing at all. I think the $1-$11 range is a great place to put in lots of volume and develop your skills. There’s no reason to try to jump into higher stakes games right away IMO. You will learn what you need to at the lower levels with less stress and more consistent grind.

    keep up the good work!

    Thanks! Yes, it’s so important to be not focused about results, especially because in the short term they can be highly uncorrelated with how good you play.

    I won’t say that it’s easy or I don’t feel frustration or injustice when I lose money, but I handle it much better now. And it seems it was a big trigger for my tilt issues as well. Now that I try to detach me from it, it’s going better!

    pendul7
    Participant
    Post count: 280

    Poker update

    I’ve talked a lot about mindset recently, but let’s not forget poker!

    In terms of study, I keep up the work and I’m happy about it. A big achievement is certainly my recent increase in table awereness which resulted in better ingame decisions.

    I now relentlessly mark people which helps me take appropriate decisions and I also take more time to think about the line of my opponent and mine, ranges vs ranges, going more for thin value, etc. I made a few laydowns I would not have done before but also some bluff catchs I’d have snapfolded recently, just by taking the time to figure out what he could have and end up telling myself : “but… this line makes absolutely no sense at all.”.

    This was mostly yesterday’s session, which felt great. I was able to maintain a decent game level with a few fairly deep runs. Until… my girlfriend called me in full panic because she was stuck in the snow in the middle of the forest and the car wouldn’t move any more. My first reaction was:

    And I’ll let you guess what I did right after. So RIP the deep runs.

    pendul7
    Participant
    Post count: 280

    Weekly update

    Quite a lot of things happened last week I’d like to share with you guys. So here we go.

    For those who don’t have the courage to read everything, here’s the summary in one sentence : at the end, it’s all about the journey.

    Mindset

    I stick to my initial objectives. And it’s going very well. First, daily meditation feels awesome. It’s been now 5 or 6 weeks and after missing one or two sessions at the beginning, it’s starting to become a real habit and I wouldn’t like to miss one day now. It increases my overall awareness, my focus, but brings me so much more than this. It’s crazy how big the return can be when you take care of yourself, both your mind and your body.

    I’ve also started to realise that it’s really all about the journey. We really shouldn’t strive for the end goal, because once you reach it, a new one will automatically arise. It’s a never ending story. What only matters is the journey, the steps you are taking today. And as a consequence, the focus must be put on what you can control, on having the right mindset, taking the right decisions one after the other and improving every day as a poker player and as an individual.

    The daily/weekly/monthly results do not matter at all because they do not reflect anything you do. Big scores obviously feel good but I don’t think it should be the (only) source of motivation.

    Gratitude

    It’s related to the mindset but I believe it’s very important in itself. Since a couple of weeks, I’m starting to realise a few things and feel tons of gratitude.

    First, I’m such an extremely lucky guy to be able to chase my dreams, to dedicate time and money into what I love. This opportunity is not given to everyone and I’m so grateful it was given to me.

    In terms of mindset, especially of tilt issues, I feel I took more steps in the right direction the last two months than I did in the last 15 years. I feel grateful for being able to recognise my flaws, face them truly (more than before at least) and start working on them.

    Also I’m grateful for being able to acknowledge I know nothing. In terms of poker, or anything else. The more you study, the deeper you dig, the more you realise you know nothing.

    Of course, it’s just the start, it is and will be difficult, but it doesn’t matter as long as you’re going in the right direction. As I said earlier: it’s all about the journey.

    And most importantly, I’m grateful for joining this RYE community, for getting the courses, and especially to Bencb who created them, because it brought me so much more than just improvement in my poker game. They are all so inspiring and revealed myself that at the end, we all have everything we need inside. I only regret not being able to recognise that sooner.

    Well, enough for one day, I’ll talk more about poker tomorrow.

    Cheers and good luck everyone!

    pendul7
    Participant
    Post count: 280

    Hmm something’s weird, I tried to post an update including some images but it doesn’t work. Someone had the same issue already?

    bencb
    Keymaster
    Post count: 835

    Welcome on board! Good luck and much power in your journey!

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